


Papa

by ttfan111robstar1



Series: Little Sebby [2]
Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Agni is a good friend, Agni is accepting, Diapers, Emotional, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hugs, Little!Sebastian, Non-Sexual Age Play, POV Sebastian Michaelis, Pacifiers, Papa Bear Agni, Secrets, Stuffed Toys, dramatic reveals, secrets uncovered
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:47:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24267679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ttfan111robstar1/pseuds/ttfan111robstar1
Summary: Sebastian gets something he never thought possible.
Relationships: Agni & Sebastian Michaelis, Agni & Soma Asman Kadar
Series: Little Sebby [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1751755
Comments: 5
Kudos: 39





	Papa

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FandomObscure](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FandomObscure/gifts), [Tori](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tori/gifts).



> ... I'm baaaaack!
> 
> Surprise, guys! Little Sebby is getting a series, thanks to the awesome FandomObscure and their great idea! Kudos to you, FandomObscure, and I hope you enjoy this fic/gift as much as I do! 
> 
> Also, this one is for you, Tori! Thanks for trying gosh darn it!
> 
> Hope you all enjoy this little ficlet, and enjoy the ones to come after! Prepare for DRAMA. And fluff!

Sebastian Michaelis, like any other creature that could talk and think for itself, was highly adept at picking up patterns. Particularly when he was looking for them, he could spot them with ease. Identifying nights which he could indulge himself, then, came down to finding the patterns in his master’s schedule. Though he didn’t have much use for it before, he began marking nights when he was free to indulge in his calendar, and looking for patterns. Slowly, he found one.  
  
A day after his master finished a business trip, there would be a day when Sebastian managed to accomplish more than usual due to interruptions from guests occupying his master. Those days were the nights he could indulge. Slowly, over a period of months, he became able to depend on those days for his own rejuvenation. Having some scheduled time to himself lifted an incredible weight from his shoulders. To be able to depend on one day to be able to relax was incredibly comforting.  
  
It had been eight months since he had first experimented with the concept of human childhood. In that time, he’d grown to enjoy it more and more. The collection in his trunk expanded, so now he had more than the basic essentials. He had a few more toys, had sewn some more clothes, and had gotten a few plush friends for his stuffed cat Midnight. Every time he indulged, he grew just a bit more comfortable, and a little more relaxed.  
  
Despite this, he still felt something was missing from his play. He knew what it was- of course he did- but he’d also long since accepted that that aspect would never be there. He would never have somebody to care for him. Not only was what he indulged in undignified by human and butler standards, but who would ever want to care for _him_? Who would ever believe that he, a demon, wanted to be taken care of, and not judge him for it? His master never would, and would humiliate him for it, of that he was certain. If Grell ever found out, he would probably coddle him far too much- not that he ever wanted the red reaper near him in the first place. There was nobody who would give him a chance. And so, he’d retreated into his mind.  
  
He’d pictured two figures who looked like his human form, a man with short black hair and a woman with long ebony locks, who would coo and praise over every small movement he made. As a demon, he had no parents, so he’d been forced to invent his own. The man who was stern but caring. The woman with a gentle touch and a lilting voice. Parents were supposed to bring comfort. That was what he wanted to imagine when he pictured them.

Tonight, the ninth month after this had begun, was one of the nights that he was able to indulge, and his excitement, though well concealed, was pulsating just beneath the surface. It was nearing nine o’clock. His young master was due to go to bed soon. After that, a few simple chores would be easily taken care of, and then he would be free. He maintained his cool demeanor as he helped his master prepare for bed, but once he was asleep and dozing along with the rest of the servants, a bit of Spring came to his step. He went through his chores, as quickly and efficiently as possible. Just as he was about to retire, there was a knock at the door.  
  
Standing upon his master’s doorstep was Prince Soma Asman Kadar, and his faithful butler, Agni.  
  
“Prince Soma, Agni.” He said, surprised.  
  
“Good evening, Sebastian.” Agni said softly. “Our apologies for coming so late. But we have an important message for Lord Phantomhive regarding some of the trade coming from India.”  
  
“If you prefer, I can take the message for my master. I’m afraid he’s already asleep at the moment."  
  
“And miss a visit with my good friend Ciel? Nonsense!” Prince Soma said, smiling. “We have traveled a long way not only to deliver a message but to visit with friends.”  
  
“Please, may we stay here for the evening? It is too late for us to find other lodging.” Agni said.  
  
Sebastian repressed a sigh. Clearly his enjoyment was going to have to wait. “But of course. The Phantomhive’s are known for their hospitality, after all. I ask that you are quiet, however, so that you do not disturb my master or the other servants. I’ll be preparing for bed shortly, but you may come to me should you need anything.”  
  
“Of course. Thank you for your hospitality.” Agni said, bowing to him.  
  
“Certainly.” He said.  
  
After showing Agni and Soma to their rooms, he prepared a pot of tea for them both. He made sure the beds were turned down, and that the two of them were taken care of, before he bade them goodnight, and was finally able to go to his own room for the evening. He hoped to have reasonably met their requests so that he would not be disturbed during his private time.  
  
He kept the first part of his evening routine the same. He went to bathe as he always did, and redressed as he might have were he to patrol the manor. In reality, he was simply doing a sweep to make sure all were in bed so that he could indulge. When the coast was clear, giddiness brought a spring to his step, and he rushed to his room, closing the door softly behind him, before he went to open his beloved trunk, and began undressing again.  
  
The warm embrace of his favorite footed sleeper and some matching mittens combined with the odd safety of a diaper enveloped him, as did the sweet scent of baby powder. Just having those three things served to make his shoulders slump from their usually stiff disposition. The scent made him feel rejuvenated, and so very small.  
  
He put his pacifier in his mouth, and grabbed Midnight, snuggling her closely to him as he petted her. The weights of his life were lifting, and he grabbed his blanket to rub against his cheek. He stayed that way for a minute or so, getting comfortable with himself, before he set out to begin playing. Midnight had a new friend to meet. Fluffy was a white kitty and her polar opposite, but they were going to be best friends, he was sure.

He got them both out, and began introducing them to one another. All the while, his imaginary parents watched him, praising how adorable and smart he was. He played with Fluffy and Midnight for a while, until his imaginary parents told him it was time for bed. Though sleep was a form of recreation for demons, it was an essential for children. Occasionally while playing the role he decided to deign in sleep, if only because it was fun to indulge in vivid fantasies of his imaginary parents playing with him.  
  
He crawled on top of the covers of his bed, curling into the fetal position. His footed pajamas offered plenty of warmth, so blankets would have been overkill. He petted Midnight, and snuggled her soft fur, promising himself one hour. He looked at the grandfather clock in his room. It was now eleven at night. At midnight he would wake, and enjoy his little evening. For now, though, he would dream something sweeter than his own life could ever comprehend. The feeling of what it was like to have parents.

Near the other end of the Manor, Agni awoke to a knock at his door. Prince Soma stood there, clad in his nightwear.  
  
“My prince, what troubles you so late?” He asked. The clock in his guest room read that it was past midnight.  
  
“Agni, I am sorry for troubling you so late, but please, I wonder if you might do something for me?”  
  
“Anything, My Prince.” He promised.  
  
“Perhaps it is silly, but I have a terrible feeling that something is dreadfully wrong back home in India. I cannot shake it. It is keeping me awake.”  
  
“My Prince, why didn’t you-“  
  
“I did not want to worry you over something so trivial.” Soma answered, ducking his head a bit in embarrassment. “Besides, there is nothing you can do.”  
  
Agni stood up. “Your feelings and worries are not trivial, My Prince. They are worthy of voicing if you have concerns.”  
  
Soma looked up, and smiled a bit. “Thank you, Agni.”  
  
“What is it you needed, Prince Soma?”  
  
“I was wondering if you could make me Kesar Milk to help me sleep? Mother used to do that for me when I was too anxious to sleep some nights. It reminds me of home.” He said softly.  
  
“Of course, My Prince. Please, return to bed. I will bring it to your room as soon as it is ready.” He promised.

Soma smiled warmly at him. “Thank you, Agni.” He said, before returning to his room.

Agni put on a pair of slippers, before he made his way to the Phantomhive Kitchens. He found most everything he needed, apart from the Kesar strands themselves- or, in English, Saffron. He let out a soft sigh. He had hoped he would not need to disturb Sebastian this evening, but his master’s needs came first, and that was something Sebastian certainly understood.

He made his way to Sebastian’s chamber, knocking softly on the door. He waited. A minute passed. Perhaps he hadn’t heard? He knocked just a bit louder, and waited again. Nothing. The Englishman might be in a different part of the house but there was light under the door…  
  
He decided to check, just to be certain. He hated to intrude, but he had knocked twice, and could not shout without disturbing Master Ciel, which would certainly be inappropriate as a guest in his household. And Sebastian had told him to get him if he needed anything.

He gently opened the door. “Sebastian? I-“  
  
He paused when he caught sight of his friend.  
  
Sebastian lay curled on one side in the fetal position, wearing black footed pajamas. A pacifier was bobbing rhythmically in his mouth, and he was cuddling a stuffed black cat to his chest.  
  
In the nanosecond after Agni took in the sight, Sebastian’s eyes flew open. Instinctively, he looked for the source of what had disturbed him, and saw Agni standing there.  
  
Three things clicked into place for him at once.  
  
One, He had not locked his door.  
  
Two, it must have been far past midnight.  
  
Three, Agni saw him dressed like _this._

Normally, he might have tried to save face for the situation, straightened himself and tried to maintain that awful human concept of dignity. But his muscles would not respond to his commands. His brain was racing trying to come up with something but his body was as frozen as a block of ice.  
  
It was a moment, suspended in time. Both of them were frozen, eyes locked on the other. Neither moved. Sebastian was fairly certain Agni wasn’t even breathing. Then again, maybe that was himself. The seconds seemed longer than any eternity Sebastian had ever lived through.  
  
Then, movement.  
  
Agni stepped inside, a soft smile on his features, and closed the door. “My apologies, my friend. I did not mean to upset you. My Prince asked me to make him something in the kitchen and I could not find the saffron.”  
  
Sebastian felt the pacifier fall from his mouth, and found it moving and making words for him. “It is in the cupboard to the left of the pantry. I do not understand how you can be so nonchalant about this.” He found himself saying.  
  
“I will make my master’s drink and then I will explain. But I promise that your secret is safe with me. Please, get comfortable and I will return shortly.” Agni promised.  
  
Sebastian found himself nodding, and Agni stepped out. Some small part of his conscience was continually petting Midnight for comfort, and he was clutching her in a death grip to his chest, but somehow he did not feel threatened by Agni’s presence either. He, as a demon, could certainly tell a lie when he heard one. He could tell in that moment that Agni was telling the truth when he said his secret was safe with him.  
  
How much time passed, Sebastian didn’t know. He could have looked at the clock, but would have been no better off since he had no start time to compare it to. Even if he did, he felt like right now, he was outside the flow of time itself.  
  
Eventually, however, Agni returned, bearing a smile, and a mug of something that might have smelled good to a human.  
  
“My apologies for the wait. Kesar milk takes some time to make. But I have brought you some. It is one of Prince Soma’s favorite drinks when he is feeling distressed. I hoped you might find some comfort in it as well.” He said, setting the teacup full of milk on Sebastian’s nightstand.  
  
Sebastian looked at him, eyes wide. His mouth could only form one question. “Why?”  
  
“Why do I not mind what I saw?” he asked.  
  
Sebastian nodded. “Yes."  
  
“I have read much on my religion during my life. Hinduism is a good teacher for many things. Acceptance is one of them. Basavanna, one of the great philosophers of Hinduism in the Twelfth Century, once wrote words that I read in his Vachana 24, and can remember to this day. He wrote:  
  
_Why should you try to mend_  
_The failings of the world, sirs?_  
_Correct your bodies first, each one of you!_  
_Correct your minds first, each one!_  
_Lord Shiva does not approve of_  
_Those who shed crocodile tears_  
_To their neighbor's grief_.  
  
I have learned not judge others, and to give empathy to them instead. We are all walking different paths of life, and our needs differ from person to person. What good will it do for me to judge you for something you enjoy? All it does is make you feel self-conscious. That does no one any good. Especially not you.”

Sebastian stared at him in awe for a moment, not quite sure of what to say to that. Eventually, he managed the words, “Thank you”.  
  
“You are quite welcome.” He said. “I am guessing your young master does not know of this?”  
  
“No. Absolutely not. I would disgrace the Phantomhive name if he ever knew.” He said. He hoped it was a human reason to give.  
  
“It is not a disgrace to want things to be simpler again, and it is not one to want love and affection either.” Agni replied, the second part said lower than the first.  
  
Sebastian’s head shot up at that, surprised. “How…?”  
  
“The bond between master and servant is different for all of us, but Lord Phantomhive does not seem to be the affectionate type, though he is still a child. You are always at his side, or are helping the other servants that you are in charge of. I imagine you do not receive very much affection.”  
  
“No… I do not.”  
  
“Your family is not supportive either, I presume?”  
  
“I do not have a family. None besides the young master.” He managed.  
  
“No parents?”  
  
“I was orphaned as an infant. I do not know who they are.” He said, coming up with a lie that he hoped was believable.

“Then perhaps this is not as shocking as you make it out to be. You crave what you never had. That is something we all can relate to, is it not?”  
  
Sebastian blinked. “Yes… I suppose it is.”  
  
“It is okay to want to be cared for, for once, instead of taking care of everybody else. I know the feeling well. Occasionally when things get overwhelming for me, I meditate on my God’s teachings, and take some time to read the Vedas and Upanishads to help me realign myself. You choose to relax this way. We have different methods of coping, but we are not so different in that we are trying to reach the same goal.”  
  
“I have… Never quite thought of it that way.” He admitted.  
  
“Because you are still not being cared for, are you?” Agni said, perceptively.  
  
“No.” He said softly.  
  
“Would you like to be?”  
  
Sebastian’s eyes widened, and he was suddenly certain that he was still asleep, for this could only happen in a dream. He resisted the urge to pinch himself. “I’m sorry, come again?”  
  
Agni gave a soft smile. “I have cared for Prince Soma for many years. Though he is seventeen, he is no longer much of a child. Since I am in his service, I do not have any time to find a wife, nor conceive children, but I have always held a special place in my heart for children. We are two sides of the same coin, are we not? You without parents, and myself without children?”  
  
“I…” He tried to form words, but there weren’t any he could think of. His mind was drawing a blank. Suddenly though, he was aware of something on his cheek. Surprised, he reached to his face. Water gleamed on the surface of his glove. He blinked, trying to comprehend it. What _was_ that?  
  
“You’re crying.” Agni said softly.  
  
This body was capable of tears? _He_ was capable of tears? How fascinating.  
  
“I suppose I am. I have not in a very long time. It’s surprising that I am still capable of that.” He found himself saying.  
  
“It is a lot to take in at once, isn’t it?”  
  
“Yes, very much.” He said. “But I… Would like to try, I think.”  
  
Agni gave a warm smile. “Good. Very good.”  
  
Then, as though his body was completely rebelling against him, He found himself doing something unprecedented, and giving Agni a hug, and Agni hugged him in return. A disjointed thought in his mind questioned it, until he silenced it on his own. This was what it was _supposed_ to feel like to have parents. This was what he’d been longing for. Unconditional love and acceptance. It was so very warm. So comforting and calming. He did not think he could hunger for anything as much as a soul, but a sudden, voracious hunger for love and praise could very well rival it.  
  
When it broke apart, Sebastian looked down, unsure of how to feel or act. Agni, however, was quick to pick up on it, and asked a question.  
  
“Who is your cat?” He asked.  
  
“Her name is midnight.” He said softly.  
  
“She looks quite friendly.” He said.  
  
“She is.” He said, looking down at her. “She’s making friends with Fluffy.”  
  
“Fluffy?” He asked.  
  
Sebastian pointed over to the white cat stuffed animal who was sitting by the black steamer trunk, as if poised to guard it.  
  
Agni went over to the plush toy and picked it up as though it were real. “Well, she’s certainly a calm cat.” He said, petting her.  
  
“She doesn’t normally like strangers.” He found himself saying.  
  
“Oh? I suppose I should consider myself lucky, then. She seems taken with me.”  
  
He almost giggled, but let himself smile. “She can give bad scratches if you aren’t careful."  
  
“I can tell she is a fierce predator when she wants to be.” He said, sitting beside Sebastian.  
  
“She’s very feisty.” He said.  
  
“Sometimes it takes a bit of work, but very energetic souls can be stilled with a calm presence.” He said.  
  
Sebastian blinked. “Yes… True.” He said, and felt vaguely uncomfortable, as though Agni saw straight through him. He looked away, focusing on anything else.  
  
His eyes landed on the Kesar Milk. Though he had no taste for anything but souls, he would try it, just for Agni’s satisfaction. He sipped it, and felt the warm milk warm every part of his human form.  
  
“This is very nice. Comforting.” He said. It was even the truth.  
  
“Thank you.” He smiled. “I had hoped it would be for you.”  
  
“It is.” He found himself giving a smile.

“Would you like more?”  
  
“No, thank you.” He said. “I’m alright.”  
  
“Alright.”  
  
Silence wrapped around them like a blanket for a time, comfortable and familiar. Finally, Sebastian spoke.  
  
“Agni?”  
  
“Yes?”  
  
“How will this work?” He asked, earnestly.  
  
“Well, we can write letters to maintain contact when we are away. Whenever you come to the Townhouse, of course, there will be time. And I am sure my prince desiring visits with Lord Phantomhive will help. I am certain we will see much of each other. More than we think, even.”  
  
“And with this… What am I to call you?”  
  
“Whatever you so desire. I am known by many names already. I am khansama to my Prince, I am guard of the Phantomhive Townhouse, I am the Godly Right Hand of Khali to many others. Titles are fleeting in this life. It does not matter to me. Your comfort with it is far more important.”  
  
Sebastian had to think on that. Nanny was silly, and Father was far too formal. Daddy was… Well, _he_ considered it a bit frightening. So then, there was only one option left. Despite his feelings on the ridiculous ideal of human dignity, he couldn’t help feeling his words against it come back to bite him as he spoke, feeling more than a little embarrassed.  
  
“Could I… Could I call you Papa?”  
  
Agni’s smile was soft and warm. “Papa it is, then. And, if we are to go with a bit of renaming, perhaps it would be good to give this part of yourself a different name. You are a different person when you are like this. Honoring that difference would be good.”  
  
He thought for a while. He did not like “Bassy” as a nickname, for it reminded him far too much of Grell. But maybe… Sebby?  
  
“Sebby?” It came out more as a question than a statement.  
  
Agni’s smile was gentle, his voice reassuring. “Sebby it is.” He promised.  
  
All at once, the strings holding up his adult headspace were cut. The word was his release from fear. Agni truly did accept him, and it was enough to let him plunge into his little headspace.  
  
“Papa?”  
  
“Yes, Sebby?”  
  
“Can we play?” He asked shyly.  
  
Agni gave a smile. “Tomorrow, perhaps, if we can stay another evening. But for now, I believe we have both been up far too long as it is.” He said.  
  
Right. Human time constructs. Drat.  
  
He felt himself pouting, but not feeling secure enough in the relationship yet to argue, he just nodded. “‘Kay, Papa.”  
  
“Climb into bed. I’ll tuck you in.”  
  
Though he found blankets far too warm, he found himself unable to say no, because being tucked in was a new experience, and he wanted to try it.  
  
He got into bed, and laid down, Agni pulling his covers over him. It was a surprisingly intimate form of affection, and yet it felt so _right_. It felt so natural for this side of him to be given this kind of love and affection. He was, after all, a little boy. Children needed love and affection to thrive.  
  
“I will clean up your toys. You get some sleep, alright?” Agni asked.  
  
“Alright.”  
  
“Goodnight, Sebby.”  
  
Sebastian snuggled midnight close to him, and put his pacifier back into his mouth. “Night, Papa.” He said, and shut his eyes.  
  
As he pretended to fall asleep, the sound of Papa putting his toys back into the trunk was a sweet music to his ears. He heard the trunk close, and heard Papa blowing out the candles that lit his bedroom. Though it was slowly darkening the room around him, he’d never felt so happy. He heard the heavy wooden door gently shut, and a small smile graced his face, rare as the summer sun.  
  
Finally, he wasn’t alone anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> If any of you have ideas for things you wanna see between Sebby and Papa Agni, lemme know and drop a comment! Thanks for reading everyone!


End file.
